32 weeks

Good afternoon friends! 

I'm currently 32 weeks + 4 days and most days I'm feeling pretty good. I've started to have the dreaded pregnancy insomnia, I was so sure I was in the clear but the last few nights have been a little rough. I've been only getting about 6 hours of (very broken) sleep but since I'm off work I can't complain because I get to nap whenever I want haha. 

In the last recent weeks I've taken up doing yoga again, I was having a really bad case of anxiety a couple of weeks ago and decided that I need to take charge of my mental health. I find that yoga helps immensely with it. I was told that anxiety is normal at this stage in pregnancy, the unknown of when he is coming and the fact that life is going to change drastically was beginning to get to me. Don't get me wrong, I am VERY excited to become a mom but the fact that this huge responsibility is coming my way is really daunting. I've heard that the moment you see your child it's like everything clicks and I really hope that happens because sometimes I'm just not sure if I'll be any good at it! With all that being said I find that sometimes my anxiety also comes from this overwhelming excitement that I have to meet this little dude. Some days I want him here NOW and others I'm glad I have a few more weeks of just Brent and I. It's like my feelings are all over the place haha but I don't think that pregnancy is this straight shooting deal. There are a lot of emotions that come with pregnancy, you're hormones are super whack so, it's gotta be normal to have all these different feelings... right? 

Anyways, it's crazy that Christmas is only a week away! I feel like this year has flown by. It's my favourite time of the year for sure though. I love getting together with family and eating all the yummy food. Theres nothing more special than spending time with your family, we're always so busy throughout the year that when it does come time for the holidays I really cherish the time I get to spend with them. I think it's safe to say I'm really looking forward to Christmas haha. 

I hope that your week before Christmas goes quickly and well! Here's to the last few weeks of 2017! Enjoy them! :) 

29 weeks

Hello Friends! 

I am currently 29 Weeks and 5 days. Time feels like it has been flying by. I have been officially off of work for just over a week now, I started having some complications a couple of weeks ago. I thought I was having some really bad braxton hicks but it turns out they were early contractions, since I'm a first time mom I didn't really know what to expect or what was really happening haha. I went to my doctor and he decided that it was time to take me off, that way baby can hopefully cook for a little longer... I mean it feels like it is wayyy to early for him to come.

Him... did you catch that? Yup, we are having a little boy! I am so over the moon excited, I was convinced we were having a girl so, when the technician said a boy I was super shocked. But in a good way of course, I have always wanted a boy first and finding out that this little guy is indeed a boy just made it that much better. 

I've been feeling pretty good lately, I do find that as I'm getting closer and closer to the end I'm beginning to get a lot more nervous. Anxiety is beginning to seep in and thinking about labour is freaking me the F out. I know it's something that I will be able to handle (with drugs, of course!) but it's just a very nerve wracking thing to think about... it's gonna hurt, REALLY BAD. I just keep trying to focus on the fact that when its all over I will have a perfect little baby in my arms and it will all be worth it. Right? That's what you have to tell yourself? Lol people, I'm freaking out over here!!

It's kind of mind boggling how quickly time seems to be going, I'm sure once I reach my final month it'll feel like every single day is the longest day of the year but I'm looking forward to time slowing down a bit. Life is about to change in a very big way and while I'm ready for that change the thought of it is daunting. I know that we can do this, Brent and I are very capable of being parents but I just don't want to mess it up, you know? I know things won't be perfect but I'm hoping they'll be my kind of perfect. Everyday will be a day of learning, I'm sure we will fail epically at times but I hope that we (mainly me) can take it in stride, laugh at our hardships and just enjoy the ride. It's an exciting and crazy time in our lives but I know that the amount of support we have is endless and if I'm not too hard on myself it's going to be the best time of our lives. 

Here's to another 10ish weeks of being baby free, eek... it's the final countdown! 

Have a wonderful Tuesday xo 

25 Weeks

Hello Friends!

I'm currently at 25 weeks and 5 days and it feels like this pregnancy is going by SO fast. We've had an eventful couple of weeks here at the Swance household.

Last week I fell down our stairs, baby is doing a-okay but my bum is still suffering from the fall. I have officially learned to NOT wear wool socks when I'm going down my painted wooden stairs. Brent kindly purchased some new moccasins for me that have a pretty good grip so that it won't happen again. In the three years I have been living in this house I have never once fallen on those stairs but of course now that I'm pregnant I just had to take a tumble!

We have also been working on the baby's room and it has been making me SO excited. It is all coming together nicely and I can't wait to post all about it! We worked on it for the majority of our night on Sunday, we built & painted a dresser and put up some shelves. I've been slowly organizing all of the baby clothes I have and now just need to wash and fold them. We have a little over three months to go and I'm just so excited. I can't wait until baby is here.

Although there is so much excitement I would be lying if I didn't say I was terrified too. There is going to be such a big change coming our way and while I'm looking forward to it, I'm so scared of doing a bad job. I just want to be the best mom that I can be and while I know that I will do my absolute best, there is still that underlying fear.

It's going to be a wild ride that's for sure!

xo

Half-way

And just like that I'm over half-way there. This week marks my 21st week of pregnancy and it feels like time has been flying by. I hear that pregnancy tends to go by pretty quickly until you reach that last month, then it feels like a never ending ordeal lol I'm kind of looking forward to it because I feel like time is just going way too fast. 

I've been feeling pretty good lately, I no longer have the horrible morning sickness that riddled my body in the first trimester. The only real complaint that I have is how much my back hurts, my tailbone has been getting the brunt of it. I have read that it's all normal (obviously) but I'm sure that working 9 hours a day on my feet doesn't really help. 

I have to admit that I never realized how hard pregnancy could truly be, I know that sounds naive but so often we see people portray their pregnancy to be this picture perfect event when I feel like in reality it's much harder than that. There are so many wonderful things that come with pregnancy, like having a baby but it seems like the nitty gritty parts of it doesn't really get talked about. For example, you're constantly exhausted, your body is growing in ways you never knew could happen and bones are shifting and getting you ready to pop that baby out. It's also a little gross at times too, Brent calls me "Fart Cannon" which I think is a self-explanatory name. Don't even get me started on the hormones, oh those pesky friggen hormones! Everything makes me tear up and sometimes my heart literally hurts lol or sometimes I get way too angry and thats when Brent calls me by my supervillan name "Pregnito". 

All in all though, this process has been such a beautiful and enlightening experience. I will never again judge a pregnant woman and think she's exaggerating when she says something hurts or if she feels a certain way (I was such an asshole to think like that in the first place). I am so unbelievably grateful for this experience, I'm truly learning more about myself and my relationship to Brent is growing in ways that I never imagined. 

I am so excited for the next few months, I really want to enjoy this time and let myself be lazy (I have a feeling Netflix binges won't be as easy once baby is here) and spend as much time with Brent as possible because soon enough it won't just be the two of us. 

Here's to week 21, let's hope that the next 19 weeks go just as smoothly! 

xo 

A new chapter

It has been a very long time since I last posted, I didn't really feel like I had much going on in life to post about and the urge to open up the computer to write just wasn't there anymore. Today I'm in the mood to write so here I am.

A lot has happened since I last wrote on the blog, I started a new job working at the factory where Brent works. I started working there having a good maternity leave in mind, even though we were only thinking about starting to "try" at the end of the year, I wanted to get a head start and put in the time. Unfortunately, owning your own business doesn't assure that you'll have a good maternity leave, especially when you aren't paying yourself much, if anything at all. Starting the job at the factory led me to put the candle business on the back burner for a bit. I feel like I put a lot of effort into it for the last two years, there were a lot of ups but many downs and I definitely needed a bit of a mental break. I'm looking forward to getting back into it but it'll all be done in due time.

Let's go back to how Brent and I wanted to start trying for a baby at the end of the year, as it turns out I'm pregnant! I have to say it was a very big surprise. Everyone I know kept warning me that I needed to get off the pill early since it can take 6 months to a year to get pregnant. Since I was a having a lot of stomach issues, constantly nauseous and feeling awful my doctor and I concluded that it was connected to the pill so I decided to get off it. I went off the pill in March and have to admit I felt SO much better, my body was happy, energized and no longer sick but it only lasted for about a month. I started working at the factory on April 24th and found out I was four weeks pregnant on June 3rd. I think it safe to say that I may be a little more fertile than I thought lol.

This new adventure has been quite the rollercoaster, I have to admit that the first three months felt like hell on earth. Starting a new job that is extremely physically demanding and being in your first trimester is just a recipe for disaster. I don't think I have ever felt so sick, tired and physically exhausted in all my life. For three months all I did was work and lay in bed or on the couch, there was no part of me that had the energy or stomach to do anything. Imagine the worst hangover you have ever had and having it for three months straight, that's basically my first trimester. It was not fun.

Once I reached the 12th week I started to see a big difference in how I was feeling, being tired all the time is still a thing but I have far more energy than I used too and the best part is NO MORNING SICKNESS. Not feeling like I'm going to throw up every minute of the day is amazing and I thank god every day that I am not one of the unfortunate pregnant ladies who has morning sickness for all nine months.

I'm currently in my 17th week and holy crap it feels like time is flying. I am so excited for this new journey and I can't wait to start documenting it on here. Hope you guys follow along and I encourage anyone who's a mom or in the process of becoming a mom to reach out and let me know what I'm doing here haha cuz it definitely feels like I'm going into this blindly!

Hope you all have a wonderful week.

xo

Oh the GORE.

So, we had a very traumatizing night on Tuesday. Full disclosure, Brent and I are doing fine and Dexter is slowly on the mend.

This is a story about my cats testicles, if you don't want grossness I suggest you stop reading from here on out! Shall we begin? Great!

On January 24th Dexter got neutered, was put on some drugs and sent home. The surgery went well and his recovery went very well too... or so we thought. About a week after his surgery Brent and I decided to take his e-collar off, he was completely miserable in it, his incision looked to be healed up and we figured that since I would be home for about three days straight I could keep an eye on him.

Everything was fine for about a week and a few days but on Sunday I was checking out his ballsack and it looked like it was super swollen and larger than normal. Since I'm so paranoid I mentioned it to Brent he took a look and didn't think there was much going on. Fast forward to Tuesday and although they didn't swell up even more, Dexter was licking down there an awful lot and it looked like a little sore had appeared. We put the cone back on (to keep him from licking) and I called the vet to make an appointment.

This is where is gets gory and scary. Brent and I are in the process of redecorating our bedroom, so we were painting and Dex was laying down on the bed watching us. When I looked over I saw that he was REALLY going to town on his balls, he was using his paws and trying to get his face down there and that's when it happened, blood starting gushing everywhere.

I picked him up as fast I could and 30 seconds later we were out the door. Picture this me in a t-shirt and sweats, Brent scrambling to get me my boots and us running in the freezing rain to our car. It was seriously the fastest we had ever moved and I am actually so impressed with how fast we got to the vet. Once we arrived they immediately took a look at him and took him into the back room, the sounds that came out of my poor baby were seriously heartbreaking. You could tell that the poor cat was in excruciating pain and was not enjoying his time in there. Once the worst of it was over they brought Dex back into the room and told us that he had an abscess of blood but no infection. Since the incision site was healed perfectly, there was no way for that extra blood to come out which answered why there was a sore, the blood was trying to come out. Dex ended up giving himself the help he needed and got the blood out himself.

As scary and crazy this whole situation was, I'm so happy with how Brent and I handled the situation. We've been together for 7 years and had never experienced a real scary situation, you know one that was happening directly to us. I honestly think that we handled it pretty well and I cannot be more grateful for how good of a team we are! I lucked out with that one you guys.

Anyways, that is Dexter's Ball story... It was gruesome but he's going to be okay and that is all that really matters! Definitely gives us a laugh because lets be real here... my cats balls literally exploded! Who can say that? Ha! Well friends hope you have a wonderful weekend! :)

Realness

Okay, so I have been blogging for about three years now and even though I haven't kept up with it weekly (or monthly haha) I have to admit that I truly love it. I feel like I have finally found the love I had back in 2013 for writing.

I have to admit it's been a while since I have felt this connected to myself. I feel the fire to write again and even though I know my writing isn't perfect and my grammar may be off, that doesn't really matter does it? This is my space on the internet and I'm going to start using it again, talking about MY opinions, MY days, MY life and I'm excited.

I've been reading a book called "F*ck it, the ultimate spiritual way" by John C. Parkin and I'm really enjoying it. I've begun to say Fuck it to so many things and its making me feel better. Especially when it comes to this blog. There are SO many blogs out there and they are all so damn PERFECT. It's intimidating and exhausting because my blog will never be PERFECT like theirs. First off, I don't have the patience to constantly stage photos and photoshop. Seriously though, kudos to you if you enjoy photoshop because I find it the hardest program to work with and no part of me is going to google how to do it. Why do we need to set a standard of perfection? So many young girls see all these things posted online and can so easily get carried away with it and believe that it's a reality. I find it so saddening but to be honest I'm not going to sit here and say that I never fell for it because I totally have.

When it comes to "mommy bloggers" they're my biggest indulgence. Seriously, I follow so many mommy bloggers and it used to blow my mind how beautiful their lives were. I mean everything was always perfectly clean, super white, super hip and "with it". I remember thinking to myself, how do they have three kids and have a home that is SO DAMN CLEAN. I live with another adult human and we find ourselves occasionally getting super messy, if we were to add in a baby to the mix I honestly doubt that I would be able to keep up. But I guess that is something for future Kat to worry about, right? Anyways, once I discovered GOMI it was pretty eye opening because I used to be a hardcore fangirl and the ladies on those forums opened my eyes. These bloggers lives are NOT perfect, they get a SHIT TON of things for free and their job is to literally make their lives look perfect and staged and all rainbows and butterflies. It ain't happening here because I seriously have no patience for it.

I run a business and have two jobs, I don't have the time to make my life look perfect for you. My life is messy, all over the place and real. So, if you're new here or have been around for a while I just want to say Welcome.

Welcome to realness. Welcome to The Dainty Kat.

New Changes

Hello beautiful friends, 

I hope that January has treated you well. I have been having a pretty chill month, the holidays really wore me out with all the partying and drinking that we did so I decided to take a bit of a break from that. I restarted the Bikini Body Guide program and honestly, I just haven't been able to get into it and you know what, thats okay. I was being a little tough on myself for not keeping up with it but instead I decided to be kind to myself and remembered I have been practicing yoga every day so its not like I haven't been doing any form of exercise! 

Let me tell you, yoga is seriously the shit. I've tried to do the yoga thing before but it never stuck, I always thought it was too boring and since my flexibility is horrible I felt that it was a waste of time. But this year after a couple of sessions I have found myself thinking about it daily and having a craving to do it. That being said I've decided to focus a little more on my new interest and learn a little deeper and see where this new journey will go. I have been feeling the need to still get some cardio in and since I have a free membership at the mma gym I'm working at, I've decided to start taking some kickboxing classes. With everything that has been going on in the world as of late I do think it's a good idea to have a little self defence training haha hopefully I'll never need it but at least I'll have it. 

Back to yoga, I got these three books at the library and started the Happy Yoga book right when I got home. The introduction piqued my interest pretty quickly so, I'm looking forward to drawing myself a bath and reading some more.

I also want to learn a little more about my inner self and spirituality, I was raised catholic and while I do believe in a god and still regularly say my prayers, I am finding myself wanting to expand my beliefs a little more. While I'm not 100% sure where I want to go, what I want to learn or what is really catching my attention, I know I want to start with these books and see where they can take me. Here's to trying new things. 

Namaste. 

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2017

We're three days into the new year and I'm feeling good... really good. Even though 2016 gave me a beating that I never saw coming a few good things did happen... I had the most amazing wedding, Portugal won the cup (finally!!!!) and I got my fur baby Dexter. 

I don't want to sit here and talk about all my resolutions because I think that those are promises you make yourself and not everyone needs to hear them. Instead I will talk about my word(s) for the year which is Self-Love. For 2017 I have decided to really focus on my health, not just physical health but my mental health too. I had a rough and emotional early 2016, I felt stressed and depressed and really didn't know how to pull myself out of it until one day I just did. Although, I pulled myself out of the funk my motivation for working out, eating healthy or anything that really would benefit my wellbeing was totally and completely gone. I just stopped caring and while not giving a fuck is certainly freeing I don't think my body appreciates the crap I put it through. 

This year I want to focus on loving myself the way I deserve. I want to nourish my body with healthy foods, exercise and meditation. I want to treat myself the way I imagine a queen would treat herself. With only the finest foods, finest men (MAN for me) and only speak to myself with positive compliments. 

Life is a crazy, busy and bumpy rollercoaster but it's the BEST rollercoaster there is. We are so lucky to be born and to be living in a world that has so much beauty and I really want to embrace that. Join me on my journey this year, I can't wait to see what 2017 will bring. 

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